


Delete It!

by childofmalin



Series: Unhealthy Wattpad FF Tropes But With A Twist [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bully Lee Donghyuck, Bullying, First Kiss, M/M, Renjun is the quiet kid, Winter, blackmailing, but it's not bad I promise, donghyuck is trying his best, renhyuck are younger
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:49:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,685
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27974711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/childofmalin/pseuds/childofmalin
Summary: Renjun never understood. He still doesn't. What the reason for all this is. Why Donghyuck treats him the way he does and why they just won't talk it out. He never gets physical or violent, only hurting him with words. Sometimes Renjun catches him staring at him from across the classroom. And when he does, there's not a single sign of hate or disgust in Donghyuck’s eyes. It confuses the heck out of Renjun.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Donghyuck | Haechan
Series: Unhealthy Wattpad FF Tropes But With A Twist [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2048903
Comments: 4
Kudos: 36





	Delete It!

**Author's Note:**

> (Bully X Nerd)  
> So this is Part 1 of me attempting to use popular fanfiction tropes and make them healthier and more realistic (?).  
> Well anyways, hope u enjoy!
> 
> 1\. Disclaimer (!): Falling in love with your bully is usually not a good thing and should not be romanticized. I toned the bullying down and made Donghyuck have some kind of character improvement. Usually the love interest tries to "change" the bully and make him good, which is extremely unhealthy and leads to abusive relationships. 
> 
> 2\. Disclaimer: The characters I've used in this story are in NO WAY referring to the real owners of the names I've used. They are simply inspired by them. I do not want to make ANYONE uncomfortable.

“Junnie, won't you give me your food?” 

Renjun hears that everyday. And the mocking smile he says it with makes his blood boil. He's used to that smile by now. Doesn't mean he doesn't fucking hate it, though. 

“If you don't give me your food, you know what will happen”

It started in kindergarten. Renjun has always been one of the quieter kids, more focused on himself than on making friends and playing all day long. It never got him into trouble. Not until Lee Donghyuck entered his life.

Here's the thing though. They didn't hate each other at first. Donghyuck never bothered Renjun, Renjun never bothered Donghyuck so they were fine. They didn't even seem to really care about each other until they met on the playground. “You talk really funny”, Donghyuck had told him. “I moved here from China”, he had answered, still struggling to pronounce the words. 

They were on good terms. Well that was until Donghyuck came up to Renjun, who was busy drawing a picture of a cat and asked him to be his friend. 

To which Renjun declined. After that incident, Donghyuck treated him differently. Not particularly bad, but he ignored him. Completely. Until they both got into elementary and didn't see each other for quite a while.

With middle school though, everything changed. They both got into the same class and at the first day already, Donghyuck made fun of him in front of literally everyone. Even the teacher. Back then, Renjun thought it might have been the worst day of his life, but boy oh boy… He had a lot coming after that. 

First was Donghyuck constantly laughing at him with his stupid friends behind his back. Everyday. No exceptions. 

Then, in 8th grade came the remarks about his looks and his height. At first, Renjun didn't care, but after half a year of hearing “You look like you stopped growing since 1st grade” almost every day, he had enough. 

So, for the first time he told Donghyuck to back off. That was in 9th grade. He confronted him on his locker, hands clutching on his books, anger burning in his chest. “Stop making fun of me! It's not funny, Donghyuck. I hate it!” 

It was an attempt. Gone wrong. Because Donghyuck only leaned in and told him “But I think it's fun”, grinning. Then he left and Renjun felt so, so frustrated. 

They were put into a group project afterwards, which made Renjun lose hope completely. Well at least at first. They had to meet up in private to finish their project, so they did in Renjun's small room, both of them sitting on his bed, staring into Renjun's old laptop. Donghyuck was different here than in school. He was actually listening to Renjun, agreeing with him, working with him, even laughing with him like they were friends. 

Renjun was happy how things seemed to change. So when they met up for the last time before the project, he actually came to like Donghyuck a little bit. 

“You're actually funny”, he told him that afternoon, after laughing at one of Donghyuck’s jokes. 

“You think so?” Donghyuck grinned at him happily and then he looked at him with sparkly eyes. “Can I tell you a secret?”

Renjun nodded and proceeded to listen. 

But instead of telling him something, Donghyuck leaned in and kissed him on the lips. It was very quick, so quick that Renjun didn't even remember what his lips had felt like. It was his first kiss too and probably Donghyuck's as well, since they were both only 15 and absolutely inexperienced. 

“What the _fuck_ , Lee?” Renjun covered his lips with his hands and stared at the boy in front of him in disbelieve.

Donghyuck stared back, just as shocked and the next thing Renjun knew was him getting up and hurriedly leaving Renjun's house. Renjun finished the project on his own, too scared to call him.

After that, again something changed. They first ignored each other in school, not even looking at each other in shame. But then he got back to his old self. No, even worse. Donghyuck got meaner, bolder. To the point where Renjun was almost driven to tears once. It was after he got into the bathroom to pee in peace, when Donghyuck came in and filmed him (Renjun didn't even notice at first). “Oh my fucking God, how is it so _tiny_?”, Donghyuck had laughed, like it was a joke, something funny. Renjun begged him to delete the video of his dick, he was on his knees, but Donghyuck ignored his pleas. 

“I'll keep it. If you do everything I tell you to do, no one will ever know this video exists”, he said with that stupid fucking smile on his lips. 

Renjun never understood. He still doesn't. What the reason for all this is. Why Donghyuck treats him the way he does and why they just won't talk it out. He never gets physical or violent, only hurting him with words. Sometimes Renjun catches him staring at him from across the classroom. And when he does, there's not a single sign of hate or disgust in Donghyuck’s eyes. It confuses the heck out of Renjun. He sometimes thinks it's all because of the kiss, but it doesn't make sense to him. 

He thinks there might be more to it. 

“I have detention today, you're going with me”, Donghyuck tells him during break. 

They're both high-school seniors now, a lot of time has passed since he'd taken the video of Renjun and even more time has passed since they kissed, but he's still blackmailing him, still acting like nothing had ever happened between them. Renjun doubts he still even has the video, considering he has changed his phone several times in the past two years. 

But he's too afraid of him possibly publishing it, so he doesn't put up a fight and does as he's told. 

“Why would you want me to go to detention with you? Is it because you want to see me suffer too, Lee?” Renjun avoids Donghyuck eyes and looks at his own hands instead. 

“Maybe. I just don't wanna be alone when I go” He says it so casually, like he's talking to a friend. It makes Renjun frustrated, but he doesn't say anything. He just nods and stands up. 

“Okay then, whatever”, he murmurs before walking back to the classroom. Break is over in a few minutes anyways. 

After school ends, Donghyuck comes to Renjun’s desk and grins. “Damn, you really draw a lot during classes. How're your grades still better than mine?”

Renjun rolls his eyes and packs his bag before Donghyuck can take any of his stuff. He doesn't say anything regarding the question and Donghyuck doesn't bring it up again so they just walk to detention in silence. The hall is empty by now, most students are already home. It's almost dark outside too, since it's winter and pretty late for a normal school day. 

“I lied” Donghyuck breaks the silence between them. “I don't actually have detention, I just said that for fun” 

Renjun stops walking and looks at him in confusion. “You don't say something like that for fun. It's...it's not funny it's just dumb”, he says. 

“Well, to be completely honest, I said that because…” Donghyuck looks like he's trying hard not to mess something up. Renjun has never seen him like that before. Well at least not since their project in 9th grade. There's something about his hesitation that makes Renjun angry. He's sick of him treating him like shit, but he never complains and now Donghyuck is trying to tell him something that might be serious? Now he's trying to play good boy until he let's Renjun hanging again? Is he just playing with him all the time? Maybe it's just one of his many tricks, Renjun doesn't trust the hesitation or the conflicted look in Donghyuck eyes. Not at all. 

“Because what? Because you wanted to trick me and embarrass me or kiss me again and then beat me up without anyone seeing-” 

“What the fuck, Renjun, no!” Donghyuck looks at him with his eyes wide open, lips slightly parted. He doesn't look like a bully. He never has. The way he looks at him now reminds Renjun of the time they worked together. 

“What is it then, huh? Can't I just go home and mind my own business for once, because I'm tired and I'm really sick of you tossing me around, using me, I've never eaten my own lunch in like… Two years now because you always fucking take it! I can't even do my own homework anymore because I'm always busy doing yours, doing all of your stuff and it feels so wrong but I can't say anything because you'll release the video and everyone in school will make fun of me and I already don't have any friends because of you, so what is your fucking deal, Donghyuck?”

Donghyuck looks genuinely shocked. And then he looks like he's sorry. Renjun never had the chance to really look at him without that stupid grin on his face for the past two years, but now that he does he realizes how much he's grown. He looks kind of pretty, too. No wonder why all the girls are head over heals for this boy. 

“I deleted the video two days after taking it because I felt bad” His voice sounds a little shaky. “I-I’m sorry for bothering you afterwards. I just… I didn't know how to tell you that… I don't know how to tell you that I actually like you” 

His cheeks are burning. It's a look Renjun would have never expected to see from Donghyuck but here he is. 

“You...like me?”

“Yeah, I wanted to be friends with you since kidergarten, remember? And in high school I was… I was so stupid. I don't know what to do or how to ask you to be my friend again so I started making fun of you. And when I kissed you… That was me trying to somehow fix things and tell you how much I actually admire you, but I know it was a stupid idea. I couldn't deal with myself and my feelings after that. I tried to change, because I knew that it wasn't right, the things I did to you but I didn't have the balls to tell you the truth so I went back to bullying you because of my insecurities. I went to therapy just so that I could understand myself and… now I'm just here to say sorry and how I don't expect you to forgive me in any way, I just want you to know that I don't have the video and I'll never do anything to harm or hurt you again. I promise”

Donghyuck seriously looks like he's about to cry. 

“I'm so sorry, Renjun…”

Renjun doesn't say anything because he's still trying to process all the information. He just stares at the boy in front of him who suddenly looks so small and vulnerable and it makes him feel weird because he's never seen Donghyuck in that way. And he just confessed his feelings to him and Renjun honestly doesn't know how to handle this. 

“I never hated you”, he suddenly says without thinking twice. “I never hated you, Donghyuck”

And then he takes a deep breath and looks at the floor before turning back and leaving. 

Donghyuck doesn't hold him back. 

They ignore each other in school. Renjun feels like he's experiencing the past again, but this time it feels… It feels like Donghyuck won't fall back and bully him all of a sudden. Their eyes meet sometimes and it makes Renjun feel weird things in his heart, because Donghyuck looks at him like he wants to talk and apologize all over again. 

Nothing happens until the end of the year. Because about two hours before new year, Renjun receives a phone call. 

_“Hey, it's me…”_

Renjun bites his lip when he hears Donghyuck’s voice. “What do you want?”

_“I wanna see you. We could… Just talk a little. Only if you're okay with it though, I don't want to force anything-”_

“No, it's fine” Renjun sighs and closes his eyes, quickly thinking his choice through. “I'll come over. I need to be home before new year starts, though. We're having guests over and my mom would hate if I don't show up on time” 

_“Alright, I'll… I'll see you”_ Donghyuck hangs up and Renjun's hands start to shake a little, even though he doesn't even know why he feels nervous all of a sudden. 

The ten minute drive to Donghyuck's house feels like hours to Renjun. It's dark outside, but every light is still glowing, everyone waiting patiently until the next year begins. 

Renjun parks the car on the side of the street. It feels weird when he stands in front of the door, hesitating. He's only been to Donghyuck's place once before and that was almost three years ago. Being here just to talk with each other feels different. He can't tell if he's happy or just nervous. 

Donghyuck opens the door for him, his brown eyes sparkling a little. He looks… Normal. He looks good. 

“Hey, thanks for coming”, he says with a small smile on his lips before letting him in. 

“I almost didn't, consider yourself happy”, Renjun tells him and it makes Donghyuck chuckle quietly. They feel like friends. In some really weird, fucked up way maybe. But Renjun wants this connection to be healthy. He knows even if Donghyuck apologizes over and over again, he'll probably still always remember the old times and how Donghyuck used to treat him. But he'll forgive him. Because he wants to be at peace with the past. 

“I am really happy you came, actually. And… I can't describe how happy I am that we get to talk this out, it means the world to me, Renjun” He says it so softly. Renjun feels something inside of him shift. Donghyuck has that look in his eyes. The same one he always had when he sneaked glances at him during class and Renjun would catch him doing so. 

They go to his room, which is big, just like his bed and his gaming set-up. He's always been into gaming, Renjun recalls. He even let him use his gaming PC once for the project. Really fancy.

“I know that the apology in school wasn't enough at all, I know that nothing could ever make things fully up, but I really want you to know that everything I said was true. I only did all this stupid shit because of my own struggles and insecurities. And you just also happened to be… My crush, so that's that” 

Renjun blushes. Well, not visibly, but he feels the heat in his face. Donghyuck is the first person to ever tell him something like that. Renjun was never really in a romantic relationship either, not having known his own sexuality for so long. Actually, he's still trying to figure it out, but he's pretty sure that he's into guys too. Considering that he made out with Wong Yukhei, a friend of his older cousin in his room once and that Donghyuck was his first kiss and it did something to him. (Even though he was stupid enough to not kiss him back that one time.) 

“It's okay… Honestly, I've been thinking a lot about it, the past few weeks. I forgive you. Not necessarily because of your apology, but because I feel like we've both grown out of being kids and we're mature enough to maybe start again. From the beginning” Renjun sits down on Donghyuck's bed and looks up to him. 

“From the beginning… That sounds good. But maybe like, not completely from the beginning, can we start from the project?”

“Okay, let's start from the project”

“Aaaand… Can we maybe like… start from the kiss?”

“Fuck you, Lee. 

  
  


Let's start from the kiss.”

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to comment your wishes for future stories, I take request.  
> Also, please correct my English if I make mistakes, it's not my first language.  
> Thank you so much for reading tho, every hit makes me happy! :)


End file.
